Hotdog-Man
by Kitto OK
Summary: Only PG because one one word. (Whoa.. Me writing a non-NC-17 story) This is the adventures of the Dynamic-Trio (Zell, Irvine, Celerai) Who fight the Gigolo-duo (Seifer, Tanku) What will happen?


A Per-FIC crime.  
  
Yay! A completely POINTLESS stroy.. I just put it here so that someone can look up me under the pen name thingies.  
  
I dun own FF8, or batman.  
  
I do own, however, Celerai (Leather-woman), Caevan, and Tanku (Hornydude).  
  
***  
  
(At the Garden)  
  
Caevan: *randomly* I am SO better than you at fighting!  
Zell: No! You're not even a SeeD!  
Caevan: I'm too GOOD to be one!  
Zell: *annoyed* *goes home*  
Caevan: Uh.. Wh.. Why did he just leave like that? It's that kinda out of char--  
Lanette (The author): Just shut up! I can't think right now! I just wanna write a short 10 minute fic so that I can put it on my Fanfiction thing!  
Caevan: Uh.. uh.. oookay..  
  
(Meanwhile, at Zell's house.)  
  
Zell: *is seen waving his arms around* --And that's why we need to torture him to teach him a lesson!  
Celerai: This doesn't make any sence.. All Caev was saying--  
Lanette: Shh.. it dun havta make sence. It's a humor fic. Even though it's not funny...  
Celerai: *rolls eyes*  
Irvine: It can't be hard! *does the "Irvine-smile"*  
  
(Back at the Garden, where Caevan is)  
  
Caevan: This is soo weird.. *walking around* *sits at a bench*  
  
(At the bat-cave.. Er I mean.. "The-Basement-Cave".. In other words: Zell's basement.)  
  
Zell: *is wearing skin tight black and red and blue tights with a red cape and a red eye mask* *starts up the computer on the left side of the room* I'll get him!  
Irvine: We'll get them...  
Zell: You should bomb them with the Super-Macho-Ladies-Bomb, Super-Macho-Ladies-Man!  
Irvine: *take his cape off, showing that he is only wearing a speedo with the letter "S" on it* Okay! *types into the computer*  
Celerai: *walks into the room* Umm... Guys...  
  
(Zell and Irvine look at Celerai)  
  
Celerai: Why.. am I wearing this...? *is seen wearing skin tight leather and an eye mask*  
Irvine: Because. Hotdog-man said I could pick your costume.  
Zell: Yeah...  
Celerai: What's my super hero name?  
Zell: I dunno... hotdogette!  
Irvine: Leather-woman!  
Zell: Yeah! Leather-woman!  
Celerai: ...... Great. *rolls eyes and sits in the corner on a chair*  
Irvine: *turns back to the computer* Hmmm... Enter target... Balamb garden... Caevan. Gotcha. *presses a giant red button*  
Zell: Booya! Now We'll get him!  
  
(A giant ball appears over Caevan and hits him over the head)  
  
Caevan: *is covered in bras and panties* Uhh...?  
Irvine: YEEEHAW!!! That was a good shot!  
Celerai: Yeah.. Whee... o.O;  
Zell: Let's shoot something more dangerous!!! *flaps his cape* *walks over to the Etch-a-sketch-mega-computer-board-that-tells-you-how-to-do-things* *types in "Torture Caevan"*   
  
(a torture Caevan thing pops up)  
  
Zell: I knew this would be written in here!!  
Celerai: *blinks* That is so... wonderful... *is looking at Irvine's butt*  
Irvine: So, like, what does it say?  
Zell: It says too.... Throw pies at him...!  
Irvine: That's Leather-woman's attack!  
Zell: Yeah! *looks at Celerai* Uh.. *walks over to her and waves his hand in front of her face* Hello?  
Celerai: Wha? Huh?  
Zell: Go, Leather-woman! We gotta do it!  
Irvine: Yeah! *fixes speedo*  
Celerai: *to Irvine* ...Can you.. not do that..?  
Irvine: What.. This? *does it again*  
Zell: HEY HEY HEY! Super-Macho-Ladies-Man! Stop it!  
Irvine: Yes, Hotdog-man.  
Celerai: So.. What am I doing?  
Zell: Gonna shoot pies at Caevan!  
Celerai: *sighs and gets a pie gun from the weapon box (Zell owns weird things)* Now what do I do? He's at the garden.  
Zell: To the hotdog-car!  
Irvine: HEY! It could be called the Super-Macho-car!  
Celerai: *sweatdrops*  
Zell: HOTDOG-CAR!  
Irvine: SUPER-MACHO-CAR!  
Zell: HOTDOG-CAR!  
Irvine: SUPER-MACHO-CAR!  
Zell: HOTDOG-CAR!  
Irvine: SUPER-MACHO-CAR!  
Zell: HOTDOG-CAR!  
Irvine: SUPER-MACHO-CAR!  
Zell: HOTDOG-CAR!  
Irvine: SUPER-MACHO-CAR!  
Zell: HOTDOG-CAR!  
Irvine: SUPER-MACHO-CAR!  
Celerai: *twitches* SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Let's just call it "The-Car" OKAY?!?!??!?!?!?!  
Irvine: o.o; Okay.  
Zell: *nods*  
Celerai: Now let's go!  
  
(The three get into The-Car and drive down the the garden, and they just happen to be near Caevan)  
  
Zell: *stops the car and gets out* There he is!!!!  
Irvine: Do your stuff, Leather-woman!  
Celerai: *sighs and shoots pies at Caevan from a distance*  
  
Caevan: *sitting on the bench* *is hit by cream pies* What the hell?  
  
(The Dynamic-Trio run over to Caevan when Leather-woman runs out of ammo)  
  
Irvine: Yeeehaw!  
Zell: *pats Celerai on the back* That's the way you do it, baby!  
Ceavan: Where did you guys get those costume--  
Lanette: NO NO NO! You CAN'T notice!  
Caevan: *coughs* Who are you guys?!  
Zell: *poses* My name is.... Hotdog-man!!!  
Irvine: *poses too* And I'm... Super-Macho-Ladies-Man!  
Celerai: ...  
Zell: *looks over at Celerai* Psst... Say who you are...  
Celerai: *sigh* *sounds bored* And I'm Leather-woman.  
  
*KKAAABBLLLAAMMMOOOO*  
  
(A loud explosion is hear from behind them all)  
  
Caevan: And now I leave.. *runs off*  
  
(To men walk out from the smoke, who looks suspiously like Seifer and Tanku)  
Tanku: *in gigolo outfit with sunglasses* AHAHAHA! I'll get you now! Hotdog-man!  
Seifer: *wearing the same thing* *smirks*  
Tanku: My partner and I will defeat you once and for all! Revenge for putting my Brother, King Cut, in jail! I am.. Hornydude!  
Seifer: And I'm Super-sexy-blond-guy-that's-not-Zell! And we know everything about you. You can't trick us with your tricks!  
  
(They pose a sexy pose)  
  
Celerai: *eyes all big* *drooling* *drooling a river*  
Seifer: Uh.. Hornydude... Leather-woman is staring at me.  
Tanku: Take advantage, Super-Sexy!  
Seifer: *smirks again* Alright.  
Zell: OH NO YOU WON'T!  
  
(A big fight starts)  
  
~Batman music~  
  
Lanette: *sings while typing the story* Na na na na na na nana na na na na na na nana na na na na na na nana.. BATMAN!  
  
*BOOM*  
  
*POW*  
  
*ZZZAP!*  
  
*CRASH*  
  
*OOF!*  
  
*WHACK!*  
  
*ZIIIIP!*  
  
*OUCH!*  
  
*UGGH!*  
  
Celerai: *not fighting with Seifer* *is just talking to him*  
  
(At the end of the fight, Hotdog-man and Super-Macho-Ladies-Man are tied up, with their mouth covered with tape.)  
  
Seifer: *to Celerai* --and I was thinking how great it would be if you join our fo-- *is cut of by Horneydude*  
Tanku: SUPER-SEXY! TIE HER UP!  
Seifer: I was getting to it, dumbass!  
Tanku: Urgh... *waits*  
Zell: MMFHH!  
Seifer: So anyway... *goes back to Celerai* I'm gonna tie you up okay? I'll ask you again later.  
Celerai: *drooling* *nods*  
Seifer: *pats Celerai's butt then ties up Leather-Woman* I'll let you think about it.  
Celerai: *nods dreamingly*  
  
(Visual: Tanku and Seifer)  
  
Will the Gigolo-duo get away with defeating the Dynamic-Trio?  
  
(Visual: Leather-woman)  
  
Is Leather-woman considering joining the bad side?  
  
(Visual: Zell and Irvine)  
  
Will Hotdog-man and Super-Macho-Ladies-Man get free?  
  
(Visual: Leather-woman again and Tanku)  
  
How long will it take for Hornydude to notice Leather-woman's clothes?  
  
Find out--  
Same Hotdog-Fanfiction  
By the same Hotdog-Author  
  
Lanette: Ehh.... You just wait for the next chapter... 


End file.
